Dilating

Well, Thursday's appt didn't go as planned.  My doctor came in very optimistic, until she checked my cervix.  I am now dilated at 1cm and 40% effaced.  Doc said that many women can sit dilated for quite some time before going into active labor, but considering my history and the fact that I have pretty regular contractions everyday, it isn't looking like I'm going to make it much further.  I was sent up to L&D for my 1st steroid shot right away and returned this morning for the 2nd.  I'm also supposed to be on strict bedrest, doctor told me that I have to hand over all of my "mommy duties" immediately and keep my butt on the couch.  Unfortunately, I really don't have that option since my support system doesn't seem to get it and isn't helping me in the ways that I really need it.  Not to say that he isn't doing anything...I just find myself still taking care of a lot when it comes to Nathan.

I couldn't sleep again last night and was up most of the night worrying.  I'm told to call my doctor again if anything changes - but I still struggle with that idea because I do contract all the time.  My next appt isn't until Thursday again.  At that point I will be 34 weeks 4 days.  Just praying that we can make it to 36.  The nurse today told me that they delivered a 35 weeker who is doing just great and was under 5 lbs yesterday, so that was encouraging!

I have so much organizing that I want to get done before the baby arrives.  My parents will be here tomorrow afternoon and have offered to help, so hopefully we can find the items that I need brought up from the basement and get most of the baby stuff organized so that we're ready.  I also need to put together my hospital bag.  I've decided not to bother with a birth plan, since I have a feeling everything is going to happen on the fly anyway.

I'm looking forward to family coming up for Easter Sunday, it will be nice to have the company.  And I don't have to do any cooking :)  My sister-in-law has promised to make me a cheesecake too - so I'm looking forward to a slice of that!

I did have an interview with the outpatient clinic in town.  I have a lot of thinking to do - I know that they do not want to pay me what I'm making now.  I got all the info on deductions for benefits.  They have a great medical plan that will cost a whole lot less than I'm currently paying.  But - they want me to travel to their Standish location 2x per week, which is essentially 45min-1hr away.  The vacation plan isn't great and 401K doesn't start until after 1 yr.  Also no medical at all for the first 90 days.  Upside is that the owner said full-time means full-time, they don't send people home, there are always things to do.  So I need to do some praying on this one and determine if it would be the right move for me.  I did email my supervisor to try to feel out what the status is at work, but with the history of the company policies, I don't completely trust anything that they may say.

Can't sleep

So I feel like insomnia is setting in.  I have a terrible time getting to sleep at night - even though I feel exhausted.  Once I do fall asleep, I become so uncomfortable and wake so frequently to change positions or to use the bathroom, that it feels more like I've taken a short nap.  Bathroom breaks during the night are once an hour.  It is also becoming more and more difficult to turn over and to get my big pregnant butt out of bed.  I was using a body pillow at one point, but it didn't seem to help, so I've ditched it.  I also have to try to sleep with my shoulders elevated due to heartburn.  Oh the joys of pregnancy!

Even though I am on modified bedrest, I sure don't feel like I can rest much.  Maybe if I didn't have a toddler it would be different.  I'm also becoming more and more anxious to get things prepared for the baby's arrival.  I'm starting to stress out.

I got a call today from the outpatient clinic that I had dropped off my resume to last week.  I will be interviewing tomorrow afternoon!  The clinic is so close to home, it would be a perfect work location.  They are very innovative in their therapy and I'm hopeful that if I do get the position, I will have the opportunity to obtain continuing education in some of the areas that I was hoping to get certified in.  I worked hard on updating my portfolio today and feel prepared.  I gave the office manager a heads up that I am expecting and am not looking to start right away - so hopefully they will be agreeable to my timeframe.

33 weeks - warning TMI pregnancy details for some...

Made it through another week!  I did make another trip up to L&D this morning but everything checked out ok.  Last night I noticed was having some increased mucousy stuff, so of course everytime I had to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night, I was nervous that I was going to see blood.  No bleeding, but significant amount to alarm me.  I called this morning and they wanted to be sure that there were no cervical changes, so I went in.  Contractions were 7-8 min apart when I got there and 4-5 min apart when I left.  This is pretty standard for me, so the on-call doctor was ok with sending me home since cervix was still closed.  I'm to go in again if the contractions get more intense or won't go away.  I just shook my head, because sometimes they don't stop for 3 hours at a time.  How in the heck am I supposed to know if its serious or not? 

I did find out during this visit that after 34 weeks they will not do any steroid injections for the lungs or magnesium to slow/stop labor.  So if after next Sunday, Nolan decides to make his entrance, then I guess he will be able to without any interventions.

I missed church this morning, which I was bummed about because it was Palm Sunday.  Hopefully everything will remain very stable this next week and I'll be able to make Easter mass.

Nathan update - he went poop on the potty last night again, hooray!!

Still baking

Doctor appt went well today.  She said she will keep me on both the progesterone and procardia until I hit 36 weeks.  I had an ultrasound for cervical length check, it was 2.4cm.  So down 0.4 from last check 2 weeks ago, but its not at its shortest that I've had.  I've had a lot more low pressure and contractions wrap around my back now.  I asked the doctor how I'm supposed to differentiate since my normal is other women's active labor?  She told me that if it is more painful or feels "different" to me.  I'm still having contractions throughout the day, sometimes for 3 hours or more at a time.  I'm glad to have made it this far but boy am I becoming uncomfortable.  Only 3 1/2 more weeks till I hit 36!  I see doctor again next week.  Not sure if she will continue with cervical length checks and fetal fibronectin testing or not...

Job update:  Heard back from my faculty interview, I didn't get it - but they did say "We were very impressed with you."  and offered me an adjunct position.  I told them that I'd take it beginning in the summer.  So looks like I will teach another class or two.  I'll gain experience that way which will help me in the future.  I applied for the university faculty position but haven't heard anything yet.  I also applied at an outpatient clinic that is really near our home.   I have faith that God will place me where I need to be and everything will turn out ok.

I've been a little more grumpy than usual - I'm getting stir crazy being cooped up.  I think the weather has something to do with it as well.  Sure would be nice to be able to get outside for a little while!  My MIL has been doing a lot of cleaning for me - but she drives me nuts because she takes an excessively long time to complete anything and doesn't do things like I would.  I know - I sound like an ungrateful B)&$%.  I truly do appreciate the help, but I'm over having someone in my space all day long.  I can't wait until I can get up and do things without having immediate contractions as a result.

I think that we will have a new truck parked in our garage next week.  Stephen found one that he is most likely going to purchase on Monday.  At least we will now have 2 safe vehicles to transport the boys in.  I drove my Taurus for 10 years and Stephen has had his truck for 12 now.  It was definitely time for us to trade up.

I ordered Nathan some new clothes for spring, and Nolan a new outfit to come home from the hospital.  Our neighbor has a boy 2 years older than Nathan and gave me a bunch of clothing last fall -which was such a blessing and saved me a lot of money.  But there is nothing like picking out your own stuff for your children, it makes me happy :)  I'm totally addicted to Gymboree.

32 weeks

Made it to another goal!  I'm taking it week by week now.  I scheduled myself a pedicure as a reward for making it this far.  My doctor appt on thursday went well, and the fetal fibronectin test that she did came back negative on Friday.  So that should buy me another week (I hope).  Next appt is on thursday for check and ultrasound.

Nathan is on the mend, had a follow up appt on Friday and everything checked out fine.  He is on his final day of antibiotics.  Last night he was coughing again quite a bit though, so not sure what's up with that.  I just want him to be 100%!

Yesterday was difficult.  I took Nathan to his swim class and after I got home, Stephen was gone.  I figured he was out on an errand that he previously discussed with me.  After a few hours had gone by, I called to check his status.  He had completed the errand and was out with the neighbor, said they were going to go looking around at some other stuff.  Didn't think much of it, although was a little irritated that I'm supposed to have some help here, but the guy deserves a little time to himself.  Well after another 5 hours, I decided to call again.  He's still out having some beers.  He was gone a total of 8.5 hours without checking in on me and no heads up at all.  I was/am so pissed.  I'm not mad that he wanted to go hang out with a friend - more mad that there was no consideration to call and check in, or let me know ahead of time.  Who cares that I'm supposed to be on bedrest with activity restrictions with an active 3 yr old at home right??  Ok vent over.

Since we were running out of things in the house, I decided to go to the grocery store after church today (not supposed to be doing that either).  But I'm so pissed off that I'm not going to ask my husband for anything.  My body totally lets me know it when I overdo.....and I definitely overdid it.  Have been having constant contractions that started at the store.  On top of that, Nathan dropped his really nice winter hat somewhere in the store as well.  Hoping the customer service desk will contact me if someone turns it in, although I have a feeling that someone probably picked up and kept it.

On the bright side, when I got home from church, I hear hammering downstairs.  Good sign - Stephen is working on framing the basement walls.  I'll be so relieved when its done and we can get the spray foam insulation completed.  Our basement is huge and it will be such a blessing to have it as a more livable space instead of just storage.

Contractions...

The past few days I've had stronger and more frequent contractions, they are starting to wrap all the way around my back.  I've gotten a little off schedule with my procardia, but am still taking it.  I've had a few occasions where I've forgotten and then remembered an hour or so later, so its altered my 6 hour routine a bit.  I've just been adjusting the time once I remember to take it.  Yesterday I allowed myself an outing with my Mom.  We went to the movies.  I figured it would be a safe outing since I just had to go inside and sit for a few hours.  The baby was moving like crazy though and I ended up having to get up and use the bathroom 4x during the movie!  Then in the evening contractions started up pretty severe for almost 3 1/2 hours.  I finally was able to get some sleep, but was tempted more than a couple times to call the doctor.  I just hate to have to go in to L&D again to get checked out.  Seems like its becoming a routine, every 2 weeks.  I was there at 27, then at 29, now I'm 31 and having issues again.  I have to go get my shot tomorrow and I decided that I'm going to ask the doctor to check me and do another Ffn test to be sure that everything is ok.  I don't feel comfortable going any distance away from my doctor unless I have a negative Ffn test within the past week or so, and its been over 2 weeks since my last one.
Nathan seems to be feeling better, I'm so glad.  He definitely doesn't want to nap for me anymore though.  Makes it hard when I'm home alone with him, and he hasn't been falling asleep well at night - and getting up early.  I think it will be better once the weather warms up and we can get him outside to burn off some energy.  I'd love for it to start to warm up, then I could sit outside for a bit.  Definitely going stir crazy inside the house all the time.

31 weeks

I made it another week!  I decided that if I make it to 32, then I'm going to treat myself to a pedicure.  My feet are in pretty rough shape, and it is pretty difficult for me to reach them!  Then at least they will look good for when I deliver this little guy. 
Nathan was wheezing on Thursday night, so Friday I decided to take him in to get checked out.  He had to have a breathing treatment at the office, then we were prescribed a nebulizer with albuterol for home use as well as prednisone for 4 days and antibiotic for a sinus infection.  This visit by far took the longest, we left the house at 10:20am and didn't get back until 1:45pm.  I was on my feet way too much and ended up having very frequent contractions for about 4 hours straight.  I decided not to call the doctor because the intensity was very similar to what I've already been experiencing, and my last visits to L&D I checked out ok, despite the contractions.  Thankfully the contractions ended up subsiding with rest.  Not much I could have done about it - Nathan needed me.
I've been resting all weekend, we had to skip Nathan's first session of swim for spring and stayed home from church today.  I'm hoping that he feels better by Tuesday so that he can go to school and won't miss out on the weeks activities.  It's a bummer to be cooped up all day when the weather is a bit warmer today - I would love to go for a walk!
Still no word on the job front.  I'm starting to re-vamp my portfolio in case I get called for another interview for faculty.  I should be able to get it all done this week.  I did get approved for long-term disability and was pleasantly surprised that it will include 6-8 weeks of maternity leave after the baby is born.  Now I just have to get to full-term!  I'm getting pretty darn close now - only 6 more weeks to go until I'm at the magic 37....

No change

I'm now 30 weeks 4 days!  Made the 30 week goal!  My dear friend dropped off a celebration cake for me - which is delicious :)  I'm taking my goals in 2 week increments.  Next up - 32 weeks!  Doctor's goal is 34 and I sure hope we make that one too.  I had my appt today, everything is remaining the same, so I should be able to make it past the 31 mark this Sunday.  No fetal fibronectin test this week though.  I'm continuing on the same medications.  I really hate the procardia, but it may be helping more than I realize, so doc doesn't want to discontinue it yet.  I have 6 more progesterone shots to go, they were prescribed up until week 36.  If I make it that far, I should be able to bring Nolan home with me with no NICU stay!!!

My parents came up for a visit yesterday and made us dinner.  I was so glad to have them here.  I miss being able to go down to their house for the occasional visit, I'm afraid to be too far away from the hospital if anything should happen.

Nathan has another cough going.  I sure hope it doesn't turn into anything serious.  Seems like every week we are battling one symptom or another.  No fever, so that's a good sign.  I got his application for preschool for next year.  I'm thinking of enrolling him in an afternoon session - since he refuses to nap most of the time for me anyway.  His teacher is calling in a referral for speech therapy.  He has been stuttering since around December and it doesn't seem to be getting any better.  Hopefully we can get an evaluation scheduled soon since I know they don't provide EI services over the summer months.

Still no word on the job front.  There are new faculty openings closer to home though that I just applied for - so maybe that's what God has in store for me :)