Interview

I did send my resume out for the faculty position that I want, and got a response within the hour yesterday!  I had my first phone interview this afternoon and have passed through to the in-person interview process next week.  The position sounds really promising.  Hopefully I'll be able to impress the hiring committee.  I have to interview with the Program Director, Academic Director, 2 faculty in the OT program and the Associate Dean.  I will also have to do a teaching presentation as part of the interview.  At least I have a little time on my hands to prepare the whole thing....  I didn't mention that I was pregnant - they didn't ask.  Guess they'll figure that out as soon as they see me walk in!

Now this baby just needs to stay put and I need to be symptom free for the next week!  This Sunday will be the 26 week mark, I never made it past that with Nathan....  Stephen said he found a picture taken of me 2 days before Nathan was born, looking at the camera and smiling.  No signs of anything being wrong at all.  I feel that everyday I make it past the 26 week mark will be a blessing.  I plan on taking it very easy and trying to lay down as much as possible.  I got my progesterone shot today and will see the doctor on Tuesday afternoon. 

Nathan is feeling better and went to school today.  He was in a great mood when I picked him up, so I know the time with other little ones did him some good :)  His Grandma is coming to visit tomorrow afternoon, so that will help to keep him occupied.

Frustrated

Nathan has had a low grade fever on and off since Saturday afternoon.  I kept him out of school today since he had a temp last night around 100.  It's weird because he'll go all day without a fever, and when Stephen has checked him in the evening, all of a sudden he has a temp again.  I hate for him to miss school since it is his opportunity to blow of steam and play with other children - he's been cooped up and stuck inside with me!  Plus - I need a break too :)

So yesterday I had some spotting which definitely alarmed me.  My doctor had me go in to the office to check me out.  Looked like everything was fine, they ran a culture and test for UTI.  Haven't heard back yet on the results.  I was having flashbacks of when the same thing happened the morning Nathan was born.  It was especially stressful because I had Nathan with me and dragging a 3 yr old to your doctor appts isn't exactly a good time.   Today I was counting on my mother in law showing up to watch him for a few hours so I could go to my dentist appt.  It was really foggy out and I had a funny feeling that she wasn't going to show.  Sure enough - I get the call 10 minutes before I had to leave that she got lost and couldn't find the road to turn on.  So once again I had to drag Nathan to my appt.  Luckily the girls at the dentist office were wonderful and kept him occupied pretty much the whole time.  It definitely gives me pause with the whole mother-in-law thing though.  She has done so much for us with Nathan - but she can't drive at night or in any other conditions than sunny and dry, and does get sick at the last minute, has anxiety, etc.  Not sure if it is going to be a good idea for her to watch the baby this time around.  Although it would be a huge benefit financially and would be good for her emotionally - I just want some stability and a place that I can count on all the time.  Today I really felt like the only person I can count on to do anything is myself.  If I have to depend on someone else, it usually falls through (which just makes me mad) or I get some sort of flak for it later which makes it not worth it anyway.

I did hear from my case manager, and am getting the same old song and dance - someone is supposed to contact you this week....  The letter that I wrote to appeals failed.  I got a notice today stating that they will not provide the gap exception for my visit to maternal fetal medicine in december - so that $300 bill stands.  Just great.  Loved the reasoning, too - "we understand that you attempted to get the gap exception prior to the visit and that it did not happen"  "gap exceptions need to be completed prior to the visit"  "please see the in-network provider list on the website"  You think????  If there were another provider in the area that was in network, I'd go.  And it was the insurance companies fault that the gap exception didn't occur in the first place - they knew about the appt!!!!  Word to the wise - do not work for anyone who offers United Healthcare for insurance.  We'll see if I actually do get contacted this week as promised.

I did find a position for a job that I'm interested in.  I'm going to apply and see what happens.  It's for faculty teaching OT - which may be really good for me.  Next doctor appt is on Tuesday....

Week 25 tomorrow!

Ultrasound on Thursday was promising!  I improved from 2.7cm to 2.9cm cervical length.  The rest seems to be doing the trick.  Short term disability is approved to 2/1 as of right now.  Next doctor appt is on 1/31, so we'll see what the plan is.  I'm assuming that we'll continue with the fetal fibronectin tests alternating with cervical length checks just to be safe.  Continuing with the progesterone shots weekly until week 36.

I spoke with my boss on Friday - she encouraged me to stay off of work if I can.  Apparently caseload still hasn't picked up, and she said that according to our regional director, she gets to keep her full hours and I will only get the leftover caseload, whatever that may be.  I expressed my concern with FMLA, etc.  However, now I worry that if I do go back, that my status will be reduced and could possibly lose my benefits.  I definitely wouldn't be surprised if they did do this to me - they don't seem to care about their employees at all.  This company is horrible - I will definitely be leaving after the baby is born.  A friend of mine encouraged me to pursue another rehab company in town - I previously had contact with one of the owners during a volunteer experience, so maybe they would remember me.  I plan on updating my resume and sending out a letter to put my feelers out.  Can't hurt right?  Sometimes God sends opportunities our way that we didn't even know were there :)

Still no word on the gap exceptions from the insurance company, big surprise....  I'll probably email my case manager again this week to follow up.

On the home front - still struggling with the whole poop issue with Nathan.  On Tuesday morning he woke up with poop in his pull-up, and yesterday he woke up during nap with the same issue.  I sit him on the potty repeatedly when I see him do his "poop dance"  but he chooses to hold it in - so I guess it has to make its way out sometime, and his body is choosing to do it in his sleep.  UGH!!

Another day

The past few days have been pretty uneventful.  I've had cramping on/off, but am finding it harder to lay down.  I do a lot of sitting, but I know the best thing to do is to lie down on my left side.  I feel like I am up and down a lot, however I do try to pace myself with things and take breaks.  My next appt for cervical length check is tomorrow at 9:30am.  I'm hopeful that it has stayed the same or improved.  I'm still working on getting the gap exceptions in place with the insurance company in case I am sent over to Covenant.  Of course, they haven't done anything yet and I'm emailing back and forth with my case manager to try and get this worked out.  I was hoping that it would have been taken care of before my appt tomorrow.

Despite my husband's ridiculous comments the other morning, he has fixed dinner and cleaned the kitchen for the past 2 nights.  I definitely appreciate the extra help.  I also have to give him credit for attending Nathan's past 2 swim classes with me.  Nathan is in a new class where I don't go into the pool with him - which makes me really nervous.  The first class, Nathan stepped off the ledge and went underwater, the teacher had to save him.  Last class, another kid did the same thing.  There is only 1 instructor for 6 children ages 3-5.  I'm on pins and needles watching, so having my husband there definitely makes me feel better.  Nathan seems to really enjoy the class, but he hops around like a little jumping bean and I worry that he's going to hop right off the ledge again!  I hope that Stephen  continues to attend with me to ease some of my anxiety.

The weather here has been absolutely frigid...  Just dropping off and picking up Nathan from preschool yesterday was awful with the windchill.  At least I don't have to feel guilty about Nathan not being able to go outside!

24 weeks

Yesterday I made it to the 24 week mark!  At least my little guy now has a fighting chance.  Next cervical length check is this thursday.  Hopeful that it has remained the same or has improved some.  I don't think the doctor is going to allow me to return to work unless things stay stable until week 30.

I made a ton of phone calls last week in regards to short term disability, FMLA, etc.  Turns out that my FMLA is running in conjunction with my disability, so my job is only secure for these first 12 weeks.  Not very reassuring...  Short term disability is only approving things week by week, so we'll see how that goes.  I've been approved for 1 week and they were going to contact my doctor's office again.  My company is forcing me to use all of my paid time off accrued.  I had 95.7 hours saved because I wanted to take extra time when the baby came, but I guess that is going to be out of the question now. 

As for my insurance company - I finally got a hold of the case management department and gave them an earful.  My case manager called me back and said that she had the benefits department working on getting the gap exceptions in place for the maternal fetal medicine specialist and the hospital with the NICU.  I haven't heard anything back yet, so I'll probably follow up again in a few days.

My husband has been very helpful with cooking meals and helping to clean up the house.  I was thinking that he was coming around and being very supportive.  Then we wake up this morning and he makes a remark about me being lazy, and I'm using any excuse not to have to do anything.  Yeah, I guess trying to prevent another premature baby is "any excuse".....  I am so pissed off.  I told him to keep his stupid comments to himself, so now he isn't speaking to me.  And - he stayed home from work today, oh joy!

Running out of patience

So I'm feeling my patience running very thin, with both my husband and son.   With my son, it all has to do with potty training.  We've been battling pooping on the potty for quite some time.  He finally seemed to "get it" a couple months ago, but we'll go through stints where he won't poop for a few days, and then will attempt to hold it in when he does have to go.  So we go through quite a few smears in the underpants and tons of time sitting on the potty with him battling me the whole way.  The thing is, he knows how to go poop on the potty, he has done it plenty of times.  I don't understand why it has to be such a struggle, and with me being on bedrest, it is totally stressing me out to have to deal with this.  My husband is no help - he just says "let him go in his pants."  I totally disagree with that strategy, and Nathan will tell us most of the time that he has to go.  Frustrating!!

I've been dealing with my insurance company on a few issues as well - tons of fun let me tell you!  Turns out that my maternal fetal medicine specialist is out-of-network, so they won't cover that visit, and the hospital with the NICU is also out-of-network.  Fantastic!  Of course, I'm hopeful that I won't have to deliver there, but it is a very real possibility that I might.  The insurance rep was very courteous and educated me on gap exceptions that can be obtained prior - but that means I have to make plenty of phone calls, etc. in order to coordinate this.  What is really frustrating is that I am enrolled in the Healthy Pregnancy program and have a case manager assigned by the insurance company since I'm high risk.  The case management program is supposed to assist with coordination of care - except that they don't.  What the hell?  I really don't need extra phone calls to brief an additional person on my pregnancy status if they aren't going to assist me with anything!  What exactly do they consider "coordinating care?"

Guess I should start the phone calls....

Bedrest

My ultrasound on January 3rd didn't go so well.  My cervix had shortened to 2.3cm with funneling.  Dr immediately took me off work until further notice.  At only 21 weeks, that is a very long time to be off of work!  We did another check this past Thursday the 10th which was improved to 2.7cm with no funneling.  My doc seems to think the funneling was due to cramping at the time which put pressure on the area.  I'm now 23 weeks today.  My goal is to make it past 32 weeks, so 9 more to go!  Doctor said that if I have 2 more good ultrasounds, there is a possibility that she may send me back to work.  This would be a good thing if there is a strong caseload at work to keep my hours decent, but that hasn't been the case for the entire month of December and so far not looking good in January.  My bonus has been cut in half and we just got word that there will be no consideration of merit raises until June.  Looks like  I'll be attempting to find another job after this baby is born.

I'm hoping that with attempts to rest as much as possible (which isn't much, even at home) that I can keep this baby safe and snug and prevent another stay in the NICU.  I'm finding it very difficult to stay off my feet.  Definitely hard to do with a 3 year old running around, and I still have to shuttle him to his activities, preschool, etc.  I'm trying to make more crockpot recipes to prevent having to be on my feet too long in the kitchen, but dishes drive me crazy - so those must be done....  At least my bedrest orders aren't extremely strict at this point and I do have permission to get up and move around.  I would hate to be hospitalized!  I've heard some women can be hospitalized for a few months prior to delivery with certain conditions....how horrible!  The things we women go through to keep our little ones safe :)  It's a good thing men don't give birth - I know there is no way my husband could deal with this.

Been a long time

My last post was pre-baby #1.  I ended up having Nathan early - 14 weeks early....  We had a long road in the NICU, but he made it and is now a happy healthy 3 year old!  The builder that I spoke of in the last post did end up building our new house, but it took a while and we ended up staying at my mother-in-laws house for nearly a year.  Not quite how I imagined things would go.

Fast forward to present - I'm now almost 22 weeks pregnant with baby #2 (another boy).  I've already had a few complications this pregnancy and am anticipating that my doctor will most likely put me on bedrest at some point to prevent preterm labor.  Definitely don't want to have another preemie and go through what we did last time.

I haven't been able to workout during this pregnancy, things have been pretty busy and I'm supposed to be taking it easy.  I did get back into running the past year and ran a 10K on the 4th of July - which felt pretty great to accomplish!  I had also dropped my weight down quite a bit.  My new years resolution this year is to get back down to pre-baby weight by the end of 2013.  Baby is due on May 12th, so that will give me plenty of time :)

The job has been very rocky since November - my company has made a lot of cutbacks, to include my hours.  I haven't worked at all this week - but I'm trying not to stress out too much about it.  Our caseload is next to nothing, but hopefully it will pick up really soon.  The unfortunate thing is that most places aren't going to want to hire a pregnant woman, even for PRN work.  So I think I'm pretty much stuck until this baby is born.  I've been praying quite a bit that we'll get through whatever financial bumps in the road are ahead.

Speaking of praying - this year I went back to church.  I'd been away from the Catholic church for years, for many reasons.  Although some of my spiritual beliefs aren't exactly what the catholic church teaches - I still think the church has a lot to offer and decided to take Nathan and introduce him to the church.  He goes to the catechism class and got baptized on Dec 29th. 

My plan is to continue posting - over 3 years has been too long!  Not sure anyone will read this, but it feels good to put things down in writing.